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Chapter 165 – Dear Tenma, I Realized How Disappointing I Was
Regarding my actions in the last few days and their results.
Honestly speaking――――I felt like vomiting out of self-hate.
I have certainly dreamed of Tenma quite often ever since I came to “The King’s Sword.”
However, to think it got to the point I couldn’t differentiate between dreams and reality while half-asleep!!
It was a totally disgraceful behavior. To think a lovely girl like me ended up calling Tenma’s name with the tone of an introverted man!
Even though Ferio already mistook Tenma to be my lover because I did it before!
AAaaahhh, yet another page on my black historyyyyyyy.
Sophie couldn’t hold back and threw her quill away, put her elbows on the table, and held on to her head. She sighed a little while suffering from the shame.
“Uuh, why did I have such a dream after all this time?”
It was a piece of memory of her previous life.
It was a dream about a classmate whose name Sophie couldn’t remember and the best friend she had lost.
“Even if I see such a dream now… No, I can think of the reason why.”
There was something. Indeed, there was something that made Sophie suddenly have such thoughts.
It was when she saw the figure of Lars and the other gold star students share their opinions and put together their thoughts.
It was also when she saw the figure of Firth and the other silver star students who deepened their knowledge through trial and error.
When Sophie saw them, she suddenly had a thought.
Did she ever walk such a path when she lived her previous life?
Did she ever achieve something together with someone else and laugh together?
If Tasuku opened his heart to his surroundings earlier, would she get to experience such a thing back in her previous life?
For example, that student who called him in the library, if Tasuku were to listen to his words properly――
Why did I one-sidedly decide that the things he said were insults?
The reason he did so was proof of Tasuku’s weak mind.
Now that Sophie thought back, that student’s tone wasn’t out of disrespect, but purely asking if Tasuku was alright as he was.
It was the words of his best friend that advised him to pay more attention to the people around him. However, even if Tasuku didn’t outright deny it, Tasuku’s refusal to listen to it should have been conveyed to Tenma. Since then, Tenma didn’t say that again.
Tenma wasn’t the kind of person who would arbitrarily enter an area that Tasuku didn’t want to be disturbed. Tenma already noticed since his younger days that if he tried to do so, Tasuku’s fragile mind wouldn’t be able to take it.
Tenma was a wise child in a different sense from Tasuku.
He didn’t force his opinion. He didn’t push it. It made Tasuku feel safer and he was thankful for that.
Because I spoiled myself with his kindness, I ended up shutting myself in my shell…
Perhaps that was the reason. When Sophie saw Lars and his friends trying to open up the future with a healthy mind, she also felt like reliving her school days.
It felt like things that ended with Tasuku’s failure came back as another chance for Sophie. It made her feel some sort of salvation.
“Really, I’m being so childish that I hate myself.”
Sophie was about to put her hand on her cheek out of dismay and ridicule, but she shook her head, thinking she shouldn’t be panicking.
As a result of acting based on Tasuku’s thoughts for the last few days, everything ended up bearing negative results.
That’s no good. I have to be more careful and act more ladylike! When Sophie clenched her fist, she recalled the silver-haired man at the same time.
“That’s right… For the time being, the current problem is Remiel.”
The wish that Remiel asked wasn’t particularly harmful. It did make Sophie think he was a fool though.
“U~hn, perhaps I should just leave him alone?”
Rather, I really wanted to do so.
The conversation with Remiel, which continued for a long time after the game, made Sophie unable to keep up with his peculiar thoughts and so she stood up as if to escape.
Luca, who was waiting at the entrance of the library, and Gerald, who was told of her location by Marcus, worriedly asked about Sophie’s physical condition since she looked so exhausted.
Sophie was prepared to be nagged about her running away from him, who served as her escort, and intended to apologize properly when it happened before, but Sophie was brought back to the dorm immediately since she looked that bad.
“Should I have asked those two about Remiel? But I don’t think those two are familiar with the silver star students, so I guess it would be best to just ask Firth tomorrow.”
Sophie wanted to ask someone’s opinion regarding Remiel’s strange thought process.
As Sophie made the plan for tomorrow and decided it was about time to sleep, she heard a knocking sound at her door.
The clock already pointed at a late hour. When Sophie responded, thinking it was Sunny, the voice that responded was a familiar voice, but it wasn’t Sunny’s.
“Is there something wrong?”
When Sophie opened the door in a hurry, she saw the rare figure of the paladin Warren that didn’t even conceal his doubt.
“Sophie-sama, are you okay?”
Come the next day, Gerald suddenly asked that, making Sophie speechless.
“Your complexion doesn’t look too good.”
“Please don’t worry. I just feel the chirping of the little birds at night ringing in my ears…”
“I see… Then if there’s no problem with Sophie-sama’s condition, there’s something I want to say.”
Sophie wondered what it was. For the time being, Sophie already apologized to Gerald about her running away from him first thing in the morning. Gerald seemed to also hear something from Marcus, so he didn’t pursue things further.
Considering this man’s personality, he isn’t someone who would bother to do something in revenge. U~hn, perhaps it’s about the black star students?
Since Sophie couldn’t think of anything else, she chose to wait for Gerald’s words, but then Luca, who was beside Sophie, asked with his gaze whether he should leave first.
Originally, in case Gerald served as an escort, there was no need for Luca to escort Sophie as well.
But yesterday, Marcus suggested, “Why don’t you ask Luca to escort you as well? You are the purple star-sama after all, so there’s nothing wrong with having two escorts, right? I think ojou-san is less likely to go out of control if Luca and that gold star young master are with you. Since you aren’t compatible with Gerald, I think you should have Luca to make it more peaceful.”
When Sophie heard that, she responded, “As expected, that would trouble Luca, who is still a student,” but Marcus instead responded with a smile.
“Even Luca had the request from his elder brother. I think Luca would be in greater trouble if he is completely removed from your escort duty.”
When Sophie heard that, she certainly felt that was the case.
Luca was a person who volunteered to be Sophie’s escort under the order of his half-brother Lorenzo. If he was completely removed from duty, Luca would certainly have a hard time.
And so, when Sophie requested Luca to escort her alongside Gerald, Luca agreed with a cute smile. As a result, from today onward, Sophie would be escorted by both Gerald and Luca.
It might sound exaggerated, but when Luca is by my side, my mental state is certainly more comfortable compared to when I was together with just Geragera.
Luca also had a negative ion effect, but Marcus’ suggestion that emphasizing the balance of things was astounding.
Marcus… I’ve been thinking for a while that if he has no intention of joining the knight brigade, perhaps I could have him work for me instead, but perhaps I should really consider hiring him?
Just as Sophie got distracted, Gerald called her, which startled her and made her tighten her expression.
“I’m terribly sorry. I was absentminded back then. If there’s something you want to say, should I ask Luca to leave us for a while?”
“No, I don’t mind him staying. He had heard of false information all this time, so please let me correct it at this opportunity.”
Sophie tilted her head since she thought it was something about the black star.
“Yes. I have told Luca Forsell that I was escorting you under the order of His Highness Ferio, but that is false information.”
As Gerald casually said that, Luca’s mouth dropped open and he stiffened in surprise.
Falsifying a statement of the first prince was totally something that was worth capital punishment.
Looking at Gerald, who said that as if the thing he said was nothing big, Sophie asked for a pause.
“Please wait a moment. Is that something I’m allowed to listen to as well? Is the person who ordered you fine with that?”
Looking at Sophie, who didn’t look particularly surprised, Gerald’s expression moved.
“…Did you notice it?”
“I don’t have evidence, but it feels like that somehow.”
Sophie had thought it was weird when she heard that Gerald was moving under the orders of Ferio from Luca.
Ferio had been a little overprotective since childhood. Since he would worry about Sophie when they visited the orphanage, would he even give another command to the person he believed could serve as her escort?
The answer was no. Considering Ferio’s personality, Sophie could declare so.
Even when Sophie found that suspicious, the reason she didn’t ask the question despite that was because it was convenient for Sophie. Since it would allow Gerald, who made her feel suffocated, to leave her side, then there was nothing wrong with letting it happen.
And there was one more reason.
There are only two people who could falsify Ferio’s name in this nation.
Since a stubborn man like Gerald would actually falsify the name of the first prince, then the one who ordered so would be someone greater than the first prince― it could only be either the king or the queen.
Next one might be short, but I’ll try to update within the golden week (‘◇’)ゞ
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