Translator: Reo

Editor: PalenMisha

Read at Watashi wa Sugoi Desu!

Chapter 57 – Support – Assam

Going into the room, I saw Toki sitting on the bed with a worried look on his face.

“Don’t worry – Yarra became Laham’s.”

“I’m glad.” Toki looked visibly relieved. 

How cute my partner was, letting himself relax in front of me.

“Isn’t Laham and Yarra’s love a bit too intense for you?”

Toki’s face went completely red.

When I indirectly asked him if he’d seen the act when he saw their memories, Toki gave me an honest and simple answer.

The reason Toki was so worked up was probably because it was still time for him to be asleep.

“Toki,” I called out his name, giving him a kiss and climbing on the bed to hold his thin frame in my arms. 

Our nushi-gems clinked together.

“You’ve only just finished having surgery on your stomach, you should rest for a bit more.”

“Eh? Already? Finished?”

“Aah, we had it done in about two fu, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t leave a burden on your body.”

“Two fu!! Mean『two minutes』?!!” He stared at me in amazement. 

Speaking of which, I wonder how long the surgery would have taken in the other world?

“How many fu would the treatment have taken over there?”

“Fu, no. All kinds. Like four gen¹, also are that take eighteen gen.”

“Eighteen gen?!!”

Does that mean that his internal organs were exposed that whole time? Just how much pain had this tiny body endured?

“Assam?”

I couldn’t bear it when I thought about all the pain and fear he’d experienced.

“Now doesn’t hurt. No hurt happy thing, right?”

“After we cure your heart, you won’t feel as sluggish and will be able to walk and run on your own two feet.”

“Un!”

“Ah, that’s right, I wanted to make a revue about you – is that ok?”

“Revoo?” Toki repeated with a lisp and tilted his head. The decorations on his head swayed against his black hair. 

Movements like that were cute as well.

“It’s a video that introduces a person. I plan to leave it in Laham and Tsugura’s hands.”

“Assam, leave to you.”

“Right. I understand. There’s one thing I’m curious about though, about your parents… may I ask?”

In my dreams, there were very few people around Toki. Once or twice a forest², a man and a woman would, separately, come to visit him. Both looked a bit like Toki so I had assumed they were his parents, but… each one came with a different partner and I couldn’t come to a conclusion. It was possible his parents had died.

“Parents alive. Divorce. Have own families.”

Divorce? Then the people they were with were their new family members?

“Which one of them took custody of you?”

“Didn’t take.”

“Huh? What did you just say?”

Did I hear wrong? This sick person, earnestly trying to live, was their own flesh and blood.

“Both, didn’t take.”

The moment I heard those words, my vision was dyed red with anger.

Neither one of them took custody of him, he said? Of their own praiseworthy child who was doing his best? They abandoned him?

I clenched my fist in uncontrollable rage, to the point my palm started bleeding.

“Assam. Is ok. Hand don’t grip. Hurt, no?”

Toki looked at me concerned and I was suddenly gripped by helplessness.

“You’re the one who got hurt… don’t you resent them?”

“Un. No resent,” Toki said in a very gentle voice.

I couldn’t understand. Didn’t he want to live with them? Or, were they such terrible parents that he didn’t want their affection?

“Why?”

You were abandoned.

I couldn’t voice that sentence.

My clever spouse, though, could clearly guess what I was trying to say.

“I, to live takes money. A lot, a lot. Parents bowed their heads a lot. For money, worked a lot.”

When I tried asking him about it, Toki told me that the cost of his treatment was immense and that he got financial aid from his country. However, if one of his parents had taken him in, the country would have given less money and it wouldn’t have been enough.

The lack of funds dealt a direct blow to his life. Toki was satisfied with his parent’s refusal to take him in.

The other world’s policies that wouldn’t let a sick child be spoiled by his parents left me angry. Toki must have been so lonely.

How helpless must he have felt alone in that cruel world?

“Was lonely. But decided to live. I seventeen, proof,  parents loved me. So Assam don’t cry.”

“!”

I didn’t realize I was crying until he pointed it out. I wasn’t the problem here though. Looking back on it, I realized that Toki (in my dreams) had always seemed lonely.

“I’m sorry, truly, for making you wait.”

“No apology. I could live because Assam there. Painful, hard, but if dead, couldn’t meet Assam. Every leaf³, at night, always see Assam. Assam saved me. So no apology. No cry. Thank you, Assam. Thank you.”

I squeezed his small, frail body in my arms and stroked his back as if to soothe him. Not long after, Toki buried his face against me and my shoulder gradually got wetter.

Finally, he could cry, letting out all that pain and loneliness.

Even if he had cried back then there was no one there to comfort him. But now I could make it up to him, as much as he wanted me to. 

I’ll give him happiness no matter what. 

I’ll protect him so that he can always smile.

The reason Toki was this strong was because of everything he’d been through. How many leaves had he spent feeling anxious?

At times, between his sobs, he told me “Thank you” or “I’m ok” until I eventually heard his breathing even out. I laid him down on the bed so that he could sleep more comfortably and wiped the tears from his cheeks.