Refuse Harem
Translator: Tsukii
Editor: Prius
Read at Watashi wa Sugoi Desu!
Chapter 189 – Sophie Linier’s Dream ―Longing― II
“You mean like the thing I did to the uselessly glittery man?”
Sophie also pointed out how insignificant Evert was if he wasn’t an aristocrat and broke his pride. Looking back further, she also uttered rather harsh words about Lars’ complex.
Did that mean Sophie and Remiel were the same kind of person in a sense?
Sophie felt offended being lumped together with Remiel so she pouted, but Gerald denied it.
“It’s a little different from what Sophie-sama did. You spoke after you expected how the other party would react as they heard that. All consequences were already taken into consideration before the words were uttered. However, the same couldn’t be said with Remiel-sama.”
Gerald quietly continued with eyes that looked like they were seeing the bottom of the ocean.
“Remiel-sama didn’t care how the other party would react or respond to his remark. He didn’t say things out of interest of said person, after all. He asked just because he wanted to. Even if that ended up gouging up an old wound of the other party――――”
He didn’t mind even if the other person got hurt.
No, he didn’t even notice others were hurt by it.
“There’s no guilt at all. Bluntly said, it leaves a very bad taste.”
As Gerald said so clearly, Sophie was surprised.
Sophie wondered why Gerald didn’t try to correct Remiel since he knew that much about him since childhood, but looking at the current state of Remiel, it wasn’t hard to imagine how difficult it was to persuade him.
“Uhn… but well, I think I’ll be okay. I have no old wounds that can be pointed out by that man!”
Sophie might be surprised if Remiel correctly guessed she had reincarnated, but not only was there not a word for “past life,” such a concept didn’t exist in this world. It was impossible to make such a guess.
Even if Remiel managed to guess something close, Sophie could just play a fool. She could act that much.
Sophie declared with confidence, but Gerald’s expression didn’t show relief but anxiety instead.
What are you so worried about?
Sophie wondered for a moment, but today was also the day of the exam for Eric.
Sophie, who didn’t want to spend much time in the confrontation with Remiel, decided to enter the hall while taking Gerald’s advice to heart.
As she walked forward, she saw Remiel, who had already completed the preparations, waiting at the table where they had played richu last time.
Was Gerald showing such concern because Remiel pointed out something about him in the past? Or perhaps he just tried to chat?
…No, it’s not something I should think about in this battle right now.
She would win the match she had to win, but that was all.
As Sophie gracefully sat across from Remiel, she then held the piece in her hand.
“You may take the first move today.”
As with chess, the player who made the first move had a slight advantage in richu.
Since Remiel let her make the first move last time, Sophie let him take the first move this time.
It was to show that a trivial increase in the possibility of victory wasn’t necessary.
Remiel didn’t argue and picked up his piece.
As the game started, both sides made their moves quickly as if they were competing who was faster. However, around the middle of the game, Remiel opened his mouth for the first time.
“The reason for your defeat last time is because you were trying to win with only a close margin.”
“…”
As he moved his pawn, Remiel continued.
“Why are you insisting on a close margin? If you move your pieces while trying to win from the beginning, I shouldn’t be able to reverse the situation by the end of it.”
Sophie knew that as well.
The match last time was something she could have won if she tried to.
However, she lost.
The reason was because of her “habit.”
“…………It’s because I didn’t know what kind of person you are.”
“?”
“You see, I’m more confident in making a game a draw than winning it.”
Sophie’s answer made Remiel furrow his eyebrows since he couldn’t understand.
“Making it a draw? Why do you need to be good at that?”
“Oh my, it’s quite useful, you know? When playing with someone of higher status, achieving quick wins is out of the question, right? That said, blatantly trying to lose would make the other party offended. That’s why I would try for a draw or lose a bit.”
The victory and defeat of the game weren’t simply about the number of pieces one had.
It was about who would benefit more when the result was a win or a loss.
However, that was――――
It’s Tasuku’s habit…
As Tasuku in her previous life, the game wasn’t a competition but a reception.
At that point, I had no idea what kind of person and status the man Remiel was.
When that happened, Tasuku would prefer either to draw or lose at a close margin.
Even though I(watashi) intended to win.
However, she got hindered by “Tasuku’s” habit in the end.
Even now, Sophie’s past life memories were pulling her sleeves.
That’s always been the case ever since I came to “The King’s Sword”…
As Sophie unknowingly exerted more power on her piece, Remiel stared at Sophie as if to observe her.
“You sure said something I found hard to understand. The same could be said for your attachment to that woman. I can’t see that much worth in that woman though.”
“Why do you not like your aniue-sama’s fiancée that much?”
Since Sophie couldn’t ignore the insult toward Christina, she replied with sarcasm.
She purposely used sarcasm toward a brocon, but Remiel nodded obediently.
“That thing isn’t suitable to aniue. She’s a woman of the same nature as hahaue after all.”
“…………I remember your hahaue-sama is an example of a good queen though?”
In that case, it meant Christina would become a splendid mother of the nation.
That said, even if she was a good queen, she seemed to fail at raising a child, looking at Remiel right now.
“You see, I could spend a good time in the girls’ academy thanks to that person. If Christina onee-sama didn’t take care of me, then I’m sure… I would have a harder time there.”
Sophie was filled with anxiety until she arrived at the girls’ academy.
The fact she, who had memories as a man, would have to go to a girls’ academy.
It meant she would have to spend time with adolescent girls.
She also didn’t understand why she was scared of them that much――――
“When Christina onee-sama invited me to the tea party for the first time, I was touched by her heart, then I… didn’t know how to put it into the correct terms, but I guess I felt refreshed…”
Sophie weaved her words as she talked to Remiel yet also as if she reconfirmed that.
Sophie intended to return the ring as she was invited to the tea party, but Sophie couldn’t do so.
As Sophie saw Christina’s gentle smile and kind instruction that day, Sophie’s heart felt comfort.
If she returned the ring, Sophie’s connection with Christina would end there.
She didn’t want to return it.
She wanted to be at her side.
As long as she was by her side――――
Then, Sophie’s thoughts stopped again.
It felt as if it was cut off like a thread.
What is it? Why have my thoughts gotten cut off in the middle when I think of Christina onee-sama since earlier?
Feeling a strong sense of discomfort, Sophie put her hand on her right temple.
She knew something similar to that.
Since she reincarnated, when she tried to remember certain parts of past life memories, she would have a strong headache. It felt as if she was touching a box that shouldn’t be opened and she was forcefully put to a stop.
Even though there was nothing that would link Christina to her past life, she had no idea why that feeling would reemerge.
“Aah…… I see.”
As Sophie’s hand stopped in her thought, Remiel muttered.
It seemed he came to a conclusion.
“Whenever I saw your face when mentioning that woman, I felt like I had seen that expression from somewhere before. It seems that you are similar to aniue.”
“You mean me?”
I’m similar to Ferio?
Even though they were childhood friends, were there such similarities between them?
Sophie thought they could become friends exactly because they were the exact opposite.
Is that a remark of a brocon?
Sophie frowned and wanted to ask back, but Remiel opened his mouth before that.
“During childhood days, aniue would have such an expression when he talked to hahaue.”
Ferio’s biological mother, who was a concubine, passed away before he could remember her. Hahaue in this should mean Remiel’s mother, the queen.
“What expression do you mean?”
“It’s an expression of a child who desperately wanted to be loved by their mother and tried to convey their love.”
“――――Hah?”
A child who desperately wanted to convey their love?
Sophie could understand why Ferio in his childhood would have such emotion toward the queen, who was the replacement for his late mother.
However, how did Sophie have a similar expression to Ferio?
“Wait a minute. I think it’s wrong to consider the love toward a sister and a mother as the same.”
“Sister? ‘That’ expression of yours is not for a sister. In fact, when you pointed your blade at me, the expression you had was the expression of a boy who was desperately protecting his mother.”
“The expression of a boy who desperately protects his mother… your remark is hard to understand as usual.”
Sophie sighed in resignation and then spoke as she moved her queen piece.
“Let me tell you this, I grew up being loved enough by my mother and father, you know? Why did you say my love toward Christina onee-sama is that toward a mother? I longed for her not as a mother, but as an… elder… sister…”
Her words cut off there.
Indeed, Sophie had a gentle mother.
For, Sophie Linier, that was――――
…………Eh?
For a moment, the thought that crossed her mind made her heart leap.
Now that she thought about it, when she spent the tea party in that gentle time, she recalled Suzuka, Tenma’s elder sister.
Suzuka was the only woman that Tasuku didn’t dislike in her previous life.
Unlike Christina’s gentle tone, Suzuka’s had a strong tone, but she was a caring elder sister and possessed the strength to withstand any adversary.
That was why, ever since she recalled her past life memories, Sophie’s role model of a woman was Suzuka.
Sophie respected Suzuka, who was kind and willing to help immediately if something happened.
She admired Suzuka, who was beautiful, confident, and fearless.
Sophie thought if she lived like her, she would surely become a wonderful lady.
Christina and Suzuka.
There were similarities between the two.
They wouldn’t lose sight of themselves, and they behaved calmly and nobly at all times.
They had a heart stronger than anyone that allowed them to overturn even their own destiny.
Tasuku felt strong admiration for that.
After all, Sophie was sure that kind of woman……
――――Wouldn’t abandon their child.
Author Note:
At 18.00 today, the comicalization of the comic earth star began! (‘◇’)ゞ
This chapter had a disturbing atmosphere, but Sophie and Rio, drawn by Mori Misaki-sensei in the 1st chapter, are very cute, so please look at them!!
I’m sure the stress you feel in this chapter would be relieved!!
https://www.comic-earthstar.jp/
Al, who didn’t have any illustration in the novel, was also wonderfully drawn～ (*’▽’)
Want early access to Cannon Fodder, Melancholy of the Demon Army Officer, and I Was a Man Before Reincarnating, So I Refuse a Reverse Harem? Support the translator on Patreon!
If Sophie sees Christina as a mother, does that mean that Rio is…. Daddy?
Thanks for the translation!