Translator: Tsukii
Editor: Aia
Read at Watashi wa Sugoi Desu!
Chapter 12
Arisu-chan POV
My feelings sank even deeper.
I wished to stay asleep—to only wake up when Haruto-kun returned.
But no matter how hard I willed it, my body didn’t allow me.
Perhaps because all of my sleep debt was paid off, I didn’t feel drowsy at all.
Forced to stay conscious, I felt like I was in hell.
The sound of the clock seemed especially loud.
Every waking second only seemed to exist to remind me of my loneliness.
So I thought of Haruto-kun and chose to escape from reality today as well.
After Haruto-kun left the hospital, I washed my messy, tear-stained face.
When I managed to calm myself down, I hobbled back to the bed and collected my thoughts.
I wouldn’t lead a decent life without Haruto-kun’s protection.
In other words, I had to choose whether to spend the rest of my life as his lifelong companion or die as a human. Those were my only options.
I couldn’t help but make a bitter smile at the extremely unfavorable conditions.
I, hailed as a genius and should have had infinite possibilities within my grasp, was bound to an ordinary boy.
Haruto-kun always had the option to abandon me, but the same couldn’t be said for me. The moment he would choose to abandon me, I’d turn into a social deviant who wouldn’t be able to leave my house.
How laughable. I actually looked down on him and thought he was just a replaceable pawn, you know?
I guess this was what people meant when they say arrogant people wouldn’t last long.
Even this foolish self knew that I shouldn’t play the victim.
Everything was my own choice and Haruto-kun did nothing wrong.
Rather, Haruto-kun might’ve led a better life if he never even met me.
Even if he wasn’t a genius, regular people have their own way of life. Now, his life was dyed with my color, and it was without a doubt my sin. Therefore, what happened to me could be considered divine punishment.
I failed to realize how much I ruined his life back then.
He sacrificed his precious and irreplaceable time for my sake.
He was the only person in the world that, up until now, continued to shower me with unconditional love.
And then there was I, the biggest villain who took advantage of that and didn’t even feel the slightest bit of gratitude for any of it.
In the midst of my self-deprecation, I accepted it.
A little later, I thought, maybe it was fortunate that it occurred early.
After all, my body would have eventually given up, even if it wasn’t anytime soon.
If it happened when it was already too late… What would happen if I collapsed after he abandoned me?
I would have had no choice but to die, then.
With all the heavy thinking, I eventually fell asleep.
Even after my collapse earlier, and with all my painful realizations, I somehow slept very well.
And so, the worst day of my life ended.
The following day, Haruto-kun skipped school as if it was the most obvious thing to do.
Why? So he could accompany me the entire day and night.
He held my hand until visiting hours ended.
He was so gentle to the point that I forgot for a moment how terrible I was to him.
That was when I began to love him.
I thought, then, that I would do anything to not lose the warmth of his hand around mine.
But I didn’t just feel the sugar-sweet feelings.
Any time Haruto-kun wasn’t by my side, a great deal of anxiety and frustration struck me.
He wasn’t even gone for that long, but it was unbearable.
What if he never came back? What if he came to hate me? What if he found someone that he liked more than me? What if he abandoned me? What should I do?
Such thoughts rampaged through me.
No matter how hard I tried to talk myself out of it, the anxiety pervaded me.
When I closed my eyes, the absurd delusions and paranoia were endless.
In the end, I tossed and turned in bed until visiting hours the next day.
There was a saying that a word was enough for the wise.
I thought that it described me.
I had the habit of trying to infer and predict what would happen ahead of time, just in case.
My rooted paranoia of Haruto-kun leaving wasn’t unrelated to this.
What I thought was my boon became a true enemy.
My nature was pointing its blade at me.
Perhaps it was a fitting end, someone who fell from her high horse and committed a fatal mistake.
But eventually, a small dream took hold of me.
The moment I envisioned that future, in order to achieve the shape I sought… in order to realize what I couldn’t do… ah, there really is no other way, is there?
I didn’t know if it would go well, but I decided to follow that dream.
For that reason, I have to be with him.
Haruto-kun was likely unaware of this fact.
It was also likely that he didn’t realize I worried like this.
However, even if he knew everything, I didn’t think he would change.
He would just adjust his mentality in no time and take care of me as usual.
That’s why I love you.
I whispered it to him as I stroked his head, right when he slept by my bedside.
The day I was discharged from the hospital, I told my father everything. Starting from the past, to how it ended up this way, all of it. It also helped me sort out my own feelings.
In addition, I demanded that Haruto-kun was to be enrolled in Advanced Nurturing High School and be placed in the same class as I was.
I still couldn’t forget the look on my father’s face when I said that. He had a complicated expression I couldn’t read, and he seemed to be at a loss for words.
Perhaps he found it frustrating that I was utterly taken by Haruto-kun, who wasn’t even a genius. But my father was a wise person, and perhaps realized that nobody could replace him and I was already at the point of no return.
I could understand my father’s worries. If I had a child and they told me they were in the same situation, and said the same things I did, I would make the same expression as my father right now.
I practically declared “This is the person I’m marrying and you can’t change my mind!” after all. As a parent, who wouldn’t have mixed feelings about it?
Personally, the fact he didn’t get into an upset mid-conversation showed he wasn’t an ordinary person.
After a few seconds, my father said,
“System-wise, it’s impossible to manipulate the entrance exam scores. However, it is customary to have the chairman’s final approval for a student’s final class placement.”
…After that, I made Haruto-kun study every waking hour until it was time for bed. It was a lot of work, but he managed to pass in the end.
It was already evening. Another day went by without having done anything.
I knew that I had to eat, but I wasn’t motivated enough to move.
But just when I thought about going out to take a bath—
Someone knocked on the door.
Don’t tell me—!
“Sakayanagi, are you awake?”
“Yes?”
Unfortunately, the voice was feminine.
I couldn’t help but sigh.
Who was it? The exam shouldn’t have been over yet.
“Takashiro told me that Sakayanagi is staying in this room.”
“Before that, pardon me, but. Who are you?”
“…Kamuro Masumi. I don’t think we talked before, but we are in the same class, at least.”
The person who introduced herself as Kamuro-san came here under Haruto-kun’s instructions.
I painstakingly pushed my lethargic body up and opened the door.
“So, what are you here for?”
“Even if you ask me, Takashiro requested me to take care of you. He even prepared a memo like this.”
Kamuro-san held an A4 notebook open and flipped through it.
On the front cover, there was “Arisu-chan memo” written in his handwriting.
…This was quite embarrassing.
“I understand. By the way, what is the compensation?”
“Points, obviously. Even when I said I didn’t need 50,000 points, he insisted. I really don’t understand him.”
I didn’t miss the way Kamuro-san looked away the moment she talked about the points.
I was sure it wasn’t the only thing he offered. There was definitely something else.
In the first place, why was she here now?
There was no doubt Haruto-kun was involved, but I didn’t know how.
And then I realized something.
Haruto-kun was always by my side. He always questioned my actions and tried to understand them. That meant…
Don’t tell me, did he turn her into his pawn?
If Haruto-kun really went that far, it meant he went above and beyond my imagination.
…To think that he kept me entertained like this, Haruto-kun really was my wonderful master.
If possible, I’d prefer if he returned earlier, though.
Greatly intrigued, I invited Kamuro-san into my room.
Author Note:
There was just one more day of waiting. It sure felt long, wasn’t it?
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